learning from a relationship....

Do you remember the first time you fell in love? The euphoria, the pure joy, the incomparable bliss you felt was undoubtedly beyond compare. On the other hand, do you remember the first time your heart was broken? The heartache, the pain, and the grief was unlike anything you had ever felt before, and you still remember it as clearly as if it had happened yesterday.

The feelings which comprise both experiences are as different as night and day. However, they do share one common, and extremely important, element; they both allow us to learn.

Relationships are learning experiences of the highest level, and they teach us far more than we would ever be capable of learning on our own. For instance, we learn about our capacity to feel happiness, and the extent to which we are able to endure pain and suffering. We will inevitably make mistakes throughout the course of a relationship, and through these incorrect choices, we learn how to forgive ourselves, and how to avoid similar errors in the future. Many times, we gain the knowledge of who we truly are as people, and what it is that we want out of life. Also, we learn about others. We discover that the human heart is capable of great kindness, and, at times, unfathomable cruelty. Finally, we learn the type of individuals we want to have in our lives; as well as those we would be far better off without. Love's lessons are not always welcome in our lives, but few can argue that we are not better people for having learned them.

Furthermore, we never fail to grow in some way when we risk our hearts to love another human being. Love is one of life's greatest gambles. We may come out a winner, or we may lose everything in the end. Sometimes, we may even be fooled into believing we are winning; only to find that we have misjudged the situation. The point is that we must take the risk if we hope to live life the way it was intended to be lived, and if we are to learn the lessons that will result in our eventual growth. Alfred Lord Tennyson wrote, " 'Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all". In other words, if we never allow ourselves to love, then we never give ourselves the opportunity to learn all that love has to teach us. In short, relationships, whether they result in positive outcomes or not, are one of life's most precious gifts, and without them, we are not fully experiencing life, or enjoying all that it has to offer.